Kurvenflug?

[BeatmasterAlex]

Hallo, Ihr Lieben! Hi, Danny!
Mensch, Danny, Du bist auch fast immer im Board, was? Hab noch nie was von Hartenholm gehört. Werd ich morgen aber gleich mal antesten, ich flieg nämlich Standart von Hannover nach Hamburg und zurück. Krieg ich in Hartenholm meine KingAir runter? Mal sehen.
Jetzt gibt's erstmal was zum Lachen!

Liebe Grüsse,
Alex


Here are some tech log entries by pilots and the subsequent smart arse replies from their maintenance crews.

(P) = Pilot's entry
(E) = Engineer's entry

(P) Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
(E) Almost replaced left inside main tire.

(P) Test flight OK, except autoland very rough.
(E) Autoland not installed on this aircraft.

(P) # 2 propeller seeping prop fluid.
(E) # 2 propeller seepage normal.
(P) # 1, # 3, and # 4 propellers lack normal seepage.

(P) Something loose in cockpit.
(E) Something tightened in cockpit.

(P) Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
(E) Evidence removed.

(P) DME volume unbelievably loud.
(E) Volume set to more believable level.

(P) Dead bugs on windshield.
(E) Live bugs on order.

(P) Autopilot in altitude hold mode produces a 200 fpm descent.
(E) Cannot reproduce problems on ground.

(P) IFF inoperative.
(E) IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.

(P) Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
(E) That's what they're there for.

(P) Number three engine missing.
(E) Engine found on right wing after brief search.

(P) Aircraft handles funny.
(E) Aircraft warned to straighten up, "fly right," and be serious.

(P) Target Radar hums.
(E) Reprogrammed Target Radar with the words.

(P) Pilot's clock inop.
(E) Wound pilots clock.

(P) Autopilot tends to drop a wing when fuel imbalance reaches 500lbs.
(E) Flight manual limits maximum fuel imbalance to 300lbs.

(P) #2 ADF needle runs wild.
(E) Caught and tamed #2 ADF needle.

(P) - Suspected crack in windscreen.
(E) - Suspect you're right.

(P) - Mouse in cockpit.
(E) - Cat installed.