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vi, wer oder was ist emacs? :D

Und irgendwo aus dem Internet geklaut:

>
> Here is a list I compiled of UNIX commands that return witty error messages.
> Some of the commands don't return the same error messages, depending
> which OS you're running (ie SunOS, HP/UX, Ultrix, etc.). Have fun!
>
> Note that the '%' prompt indicates the C shell, while the '$' prompt
> indicates the Bourne shell. Go ahead and try some ...

>
> % make fire
> Make: Don't know how to make fire. Stop.
>
> % why not?
> No match.
>
> % gotta light?
> No match.
>
> % !1984
> 1984: Event not found. # (on some systems)
>
> % How's my lovemaking?
> Unmatched '.
>
> % "How would you rate Bush's incompetence?
> Unmatched ".
>
> % [Where is Jimmy Hoffa?
> Missing ].
>
> % [Where is my brain?
> Missing ].
>
> % ^How did the sex change^ operation go?
> Modifier failed.
>
> % ^How did the sex change operation go?
> Bad substitute.
>
> % If I had a ( for every $ Congress spent, what would I have?
> Too many ('s.
>
> % man: why did you get a divorce?
> man:: Too many arguments.
>
> % %blow
> %blow: No such job.
>
> % \(-
> (-: Command not found.
>
> % sh
> $ PATH=pretending! /usr/ucb/which sense
> no sense in pretending!
>
> $ mkdir matter; cat >matter
> matter: cannot create
>
> % cd /tmp
> % touch this; chmod 000 this
> % ln -s /usr/bin/touch U
> % U this
> U: cannot touch this: no write permission
>
> % rm meese-ethics
> rm: meese-ethics nonexistent
>
> % cd ~god
> Unknown user: god.
>
> % ar m God
> ar: God does not exist
>
> % make love
> Make: Don't know how to make love. Stop.
>
> % sleep with me
> bad character
>
> % ^What is saccharine?
> Bad substitute.
>
> % drink < bottle; opener
> bottle: cannot open
> opener: not found
>
> % alias alias alias
> alias: Too dangerous to alias that.
>
> % cat catfood
> cat: cannot open catfood
>
> % cat "food in cans"
> cat: can't open food in cans
>
> % nice man woman
> No manual entry for woman.
>
> % man pussy
> No manual entry for pussy.
>
> % rm God
> rm: God nonexistent
>
> % ar r God
> ar: creating God
>
> % Unmatched ".
> Unmatched ".
>
> % write desert
> desert is not logged on.
>
> % man you
> No manual entry for you.
>
> % !bluemoon
> bluemoon: Event not found.
>
> % scan for <<"Arnold Schwarzenegger"^J^D
> "Arnold Schwarzenegger": << terminator not found
>
> % cat 'the can of tuna'
> cat: cannot open the can of tuna
>
> % rm Quayle-brains
> rm: Quayle-brains nonexistent
>
> % cat "door: paws too slippery"
> cat: cannot open door: paws too slippery
>
> % look into "my eyes"
> look: cannot open my eyes
>
> % lost
> lost: not found
>
> % make war
> Make: Don't know how to make war. Stop.
>
> % mkdir yellow_pages; cat > yellow_pages
> yellow_pages: Is a directory
>
> %touch me
> %chmod 000 me
> %touch me
> touch: cannot touch me: permission denied
>
> % ar x "my love life"
> ar: my love life does not exist
>
> % ar x "matey, the treasure"
> ar: matey, the tresure does not exist
>
>
> % talk Gorvachev@Kremlin
> talk: Kremlin: Can't figure out network address.
>
> % talk Comrade Khruchev
> [Your party is not logged on]
>
> make "bottle open"
> make "heads or tails of all this"
> make love
> make mistake
> make sense
> man woman
> man -kisses dog
>
> % echo'[q]sa[ln0=aln256%Pln256/snlbx]sb3135071790101768542287578439snlbxq'|dc
> GET A LIFE!
>
> % ping elvis.rice.edu | awk '{print substr($1,1,5), $2, $3}'
> elvis is alive
>
> % finger body-of-christ@bread-jar.mass
> Unknown host
>
> % finger huge-keg-party@big-house
> Unknown host
>
> * % make ' ' bang ' ' with gun
> * make: Fatal error: Don't know how to make target ` '
>
>
> % rm meese-ethics
> rm: meese-ethics nonexistent
>
> % ar m God
> ar: God does not exist
>
> % "How would you rate Quayle's incompetence?
> Unmatched ".
>
> % ^How did the sex change^ operation go?
> Modifier failed.
>
> % If I had a ( for every $ the Congress spent, what would I have?
> Too many ('s.
>
> % make love
> Make: Don't know how to make love. Stop.
>
> % sleep with me
> bad character
>
> % got a light?
> No match.
>
> % man: why did you get a divorce?
> man:: Too many arguments.
>
> % ^What is saccharine?
> Bad substitute.
>
> % %blow
> %blow: No such job.
>
> % \(-
> (-: Command not found.
>
> $ PATH=pretending! /usr/ucb/which sense
> no sense in pretending!
>
> $ drink < bottle; opener
> bottle: cannot open
> opener: not found
>
> $ mkdir matter; cat >matter
> matter: cannot create
>